Could Technology be hindering you from building a relationship with your child?

But really? Could my phone use as a parent affect my child’s emotional well-being?

Well…

Yes!

If you are a parent, you know that any moment of relaxation and ‘turning off’ is vital for optimum brain function, and a lot of us use social media, phone games, WhatsApp, and talking with family as a way to cope with stress, stay connected to our community, and even research things we may need to know. However, there are some adverse effects to the increased amount of phone use on children in this present age.

Have you ever heard of the term ‘Technoference’? Research describes how parent media use (e.g., phone use) can interfere with parent–child relationships and interactions. Research has shown technoference effects on parents and children ranging in age from infancy to adolescence, such as decreased parent responsiveness and adverse child behavioral outcomes.*

Key effects of parental technoference:

• Lower quality interactions:

When parents are distracted by their phones, they may be less responsive to their child’s needs, miss important cues, and engage in fewer meaningful conversations, impacting the overall quality of their interactions.

• Feelings of neglect:

Children may feel ignored or unimportant when their parents are constantly checking their phones during interactions, leading to potential feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem.

• Behavioral problems:

Studies have linked high levels of parental technoference to increased behavioral issues in children, such as whining, tantrums, and aggression.

 

Read more: Why Empty Threats Don’t Work in Parenting (and What to Do Instead)

 

• Negative impact on development:

Consistent distraction from parents can hinder a child’s social and emotional development, as they may not learn important communication skills or how to appropriately express their emotions.

• Lower attachment security:

Children who experience frequent parental technoference may develop weaker attachments to their parents, impacting their sense of security and trust.

• Increased anxiety and depression:

In adolescents, parental technoference can be associated with feelings of anxiety and depression, as they may perceive a lack of parental attention and connection.

Are you looking at some of these effects with worry? Stop there! Here at KIRO, our ethos is parenting with intentionality, not for condemnation but for freedom—awareness is the prerequisite of intentionality.

So here are some things you can do with intentionality and be mindful of ‘technoference’ in building a meaningful relationship with your child/children.

Also read: Technoference: What it is and How to Stop Doing it

 

• Designate technology-free times:

Set specific times during the day, such as mealtimes or bedtime, when phones are put away.

• Be mindful of presence:

Actively focus on your child during interactions and minimize distractions from electronic devices.

• Communicate openly:

Discuss technology use with your children and explain the importance of being present during family time.

• Set good examples:

Model healthy technology habits by limiting your own screen time, especially when interacting with your children.

You’ve got this!