Can You Really Have It All?
Can you be at the top of your career and still be a present mum? It’s a question women have been asking for decades. And depending on who you listen to, there are two answers. “Yes. Women can have it all.” Or: “No. Something has to give.” I think the truth sits somewhere in the […]
. . . But How Are They Really Doing?
The uniform is back on. The alarm is going off far too early. Within a few days, the summer holidays already feel like a distant memory. For most of us, September means getting everyone back into routine: early mornings, homework, clubs, sports, packed lunches, emails from teachers, and the inevitable conversation about grades. But amongst […]
When Did Our Bodies Become Public Property?
Why are we so obsessed with other people’s bodies? Seriously. When did someone’s weight become an open invitation for commentary? “You’re looking well.” “You’ve added weight.” “You’re too skinny.” “Have you been eating?” “You need to watch what you’re eating.” “You’ve really let yourself go.” Sometimes it is said as a joke. Sometimes as concern. […]
Respect in African Culture vs. What Respect Should Really Be
“Respect your elders.” If you grew up in an African household, you probably heard those words more times than you can count. And if you are now raising children, particularly in the UK or another Western country, you may find yourself saying the same thing. Because respect matters. It matters how our children speak to […]
Independence: How Truly Are We Helping Our Kids Become Independent?
We say we want independent children. We want them to be able to make good decisions. Speak up for themselves. Solve problems. Manage their money. Look after themselves. Navigate life without needing us for every little thing. We want them to grow into adults who can stand on their own two feet. But recently, I’ve […]
Raising Children in a Different Culture: When Your Parenting Needs a Reset
“Back home, that wouldn’t happen.” If I had £1 for every time I’ve heard an African parent say that, I’d probably have enough money to pay for all the table tennis tournaments my daughter wants to attend. The truth is, it truly wouldn’t happen back home. But we’re not back home. And that’s the point. […]
The Language I Wish I Had Given My Children
One of my biggest regrets as a Nigerian mum raising my children in the UK is this: I didn’t make sure my children spoke and understood my mother tongue. And honestly, if I could go back and change one thing about how I raised them, this would be high on the list. When my son […]
Back to School: A New Year, Not a New Verdict
The summer is coming to an end. The school bags are coming out. Uniforms are being found at the bottom of wardrobes. Timetables are appearing. Alarm clocks are about to become public enemy number one again. And for many families, this back-to-school season feels different. For some teenagers, this is the year they start their […]
Two Days On: What I Want Every Parent (and Teen) to Hear Now the Dust Has Settled
It’s been two days since results landed. The first shock—good or bad—has worn off. The congratulations posts have slowed down. The “how did you get on?” texts from aunties and family friends are still trickling in. And in many houses right now, the real conversations are only just starting. So let’s talk about it properly. […]
Parenting in a Comparison Culture: Who Are We Really Parenting For?
I don’t think parenting has ever been easy. Every generation has had its challenges but today’s parents are facing something many of our own parents never had to deal with. Comparison has gone global. There was a time when we only compared ourselves to the families around us. Maybe it was your neighbour whose child […]